Me vs. Jennifer Lynch -- sort of -- tomorrow on Roy Green's radio show

Roy Green is one of Canada's great radio hosts, and he has a massive audience across the country on the Corus radio network. He called up the Canadian Human Rights Commission, and invited Jennifer Lynch to debate me on his show.

Imagine the panic on the other end of the phone.

On the one hand, Lynch has publicly called for a debate about censorship in her rage-filled speech to her fellow HRC profiteers at their trade convention last week. On the other hand, she didn't mean "debate" when she said debate. She meant "she gives a speech, and we listen obediently".

If she turned Green down, and refused to be on the show with me -- like she did with CTV's Newsnet -- she'd look like a coward and a fool. Again.

But if she debated me, she'd have to answer questions she'd rather not answer -- questions about everything from her outrageous six-figure expense accounts for luxury junkets, to the neo-Nazi memberships that at least four of her staff use at the office.

What's a censor to do?

Well, she rolled out a new list of demands for Green: she wouldn't debate me; she wouldn't interact with me at all; she wouldn't even say hello to me. But she would do us all a favour, and consent to appearing on the show after me -- as long as I can't ask her any questions.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is what a "debate" looks like for Commissar Lynch and her fellow censors.

It's absurd. The closest thing it reminds me of is high school.

Can you pass this note on to that girl in gym class for me?

Why don't you give it to her youself? She's standing right there.

Oh, I can't just give her the note! Can you give it to her for me?

Uh, why don't you just talk to her?

Because!

Because why?

Just because! Please, please, please!

Seriously: have you ever seen such a childish tantrum from a grown up, let alone one in public life? She calls for a debate -- but then sets down bizarre and censorious rules for the media. Those are her demands for the media -- she demands that they cover her propaganda in a different manner than they cover any other politician in the country.

Could you imagine if Stephen Harper or Michael Ignatieff tried to pull such a stunt with a journalist? It would be front page news the next day, and the whole country would say, "who the hell does he think he is?"

Well, Lynch and her fellow censors have been bullies for so long, they forget what it's like to live amongst normal people who think a debate means engaging with people who disagree with you.

But I don't mind.

I don't mind that she refuses to interact with me. I don't mind her childish demand that she gets to go last, so that I cannot rebut anything she says. I don't mind, because her childish tantrum speaks far more eloquently than I can about the central issue here: she is a bully who doesn't believe in the right to disagree with her.

She is a bully who would censor her political opponents and the media, if she could.

She is a bully who is so sensitive to criticism that she will do anything to avoid it.

She runs an organization that is so corrupt and abusive, she cannot withstand a single pointed question from someone who has actually seen it from the inside.

She can dish it out but she can't take it.

She can prosecute people she doesn't like -- but she can't even take a single question herself.

How pitiful.

Seriously: is there a single question I could ever ask her that would have such a devastating impact on her reputation -- especially amongst the media, especially with fair-minded hosts like Roy Green -- that could rival her own self-detonation?

You would think she would have learned from the PR disaster last week on CTV Newsnet. That was mocked from coast to coast. She apparently thought that went swimmingly, and is signing up to do it again.

Hell, I'm up for it. I'll do one of these lop-sided debates every day for a month with Lynch -- or whatever lackey she throws into the mix. I'll let her go last every time. Hell, I'll happily give her twice the time I'm alotted. Because she has no idea what she sounds like. She's tone deaf. She's like the dictator in a banana republic whose every speech is applauded wildly by her palace guard, so she thinks the peasants truly, really love her. She has no idea what severely normal people outside of her little high-priced fiefdom actually think of her.

Tune in tomorrow at 12 noon MT, which is 2 p.m. ET.

Let me leave you with such an obvious question: if my arguments are so fallacious; if my facts are so inaccurate; don't you think a smart lawyer like Lynch -- with a staff of over 200 flunkies, including a half dozen PR staff -- would be able to tear me to shreds, especially with a fair moderator like Roy Green?

If I had a single inaccuracy in my book or blog, don't you think Lynch would be able to detonate me? If she had an answer to my charges, don't you think she'd love to expose them on a national radio show -- and leave me stammering for a reply?

Of course. Which is precisely why she won't debate me. And it's why she wants to go last, so I can't rebut her own lies.

Bring it on!